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Ticking off Mother Nature

POSTED November 02, 2011
BY Rick Wilson
Twitter: @scribewilson

            THOMASTON – What do you think got under Mother Nature’s skin? What do you think ticked the cranky old lady  enough to throw a late October zinger at us that had cross country runners looking like they were waltzing around the Arctic, athletic fields become bob sled runs and athletic directors sobbing uncontrollably

            A few thoughts on the matter if you will as we return to the land of the living with actual power and internet access. No more sending smoke signals out using the barbecue.

            Maybe Mother Nature is in a snit because:

            *She wasn’t invited into the Red Sox clubhouse for beer and wings during a game.

            * Watertown High has a beautiful turf field that cost hundreds of thousands but a lean-to for a press box. Okay, that’s my beef. I’ll get off of it.

            * Cable TV has been out and she can’t watch Pawn Stars or Storage Wars

            * She just got her cable bill and found out that CableVision is now scorching people for about seven bucks a box, the biggest rip-off since John Lackey’s contract.

            * The NBA strike has prevented Jordan Williams from signing his contract and starting the rest of his life.

            * The Thomaston High girls cross country team will not get a chance to run in the State Open. Instead their times from the Class S race will be merged with the times in the Open to see who qualifies for the New England Championships.

            * Tim Gaffney can’t keep up with the thousand percent increase in potato chip munchers since power went out. In case you didn’t know,’s fearless leader is one of Frito Lay’s finest during his day job.

            * She had to wait in line for two hours to get gas and then found out it was cash only and all she had was a credit card.

            * She sees her plans to go to Disney World during April vacation disappearing in a sea of downed power lines and broken tree limbs.

            * With cable out on Sunday she was forced to either watch a Barney video or if power was out to read a six-month old copy of Reader’s Digest.

            * There was limited color in the fall foliage so it was time to get rid of the leaves and the trees for that matter.

            * Big East football is on the verge of collapse

            * That the UConn women were only ranked fourth in the preseason basketball poll. Realistic but surreal.

            *  Josh Becket is eating extra crispy instead of original recipe and then wiping his hands on his uniform shirt.

            * A-Rod and Texiera came up in clutch situations.

* Manchester City laid the smack down on Manchester United, 6-1 in soccer action.

* Tiger Woods got picked for the President’s Cup despite hitting more balls in the other fairway these days than yours truly at Fairview Farms.

* Litchfield A.D. Kyle Weaver has a golf cart and she doesn’t.

* Wamogo didn’t exactly work to keep Mary Stolle on as A.D.

* Torrington High’s superb running  back Brenden Lytton has a sprained ankle.

Here’s the bottom line. There’s a ton of things that could have upset our noble weather women.  But this time she went a little overboard. I’m off now to pick up some more wood from one of my pine trees that now looks like a totem poll.    

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